When Michael went to the 20th reunion of his nice, middle-classhigh school, he discovered two of his classmates had become actualmurderers.
I always thought that was about the topper when it came to theWeird Roads Taken category of high school reunion stories. I waswrong.
Lynn's story is the topper. Because Lynn just got back from herhigh school reunion out East and, uh, this person who had left herclass as a guy? Well, he returned to her class reunion as kind of agirl.
Now we all know people have sex change operations. But thething is, we almost never hear of a person who had one who thinksit's a real neat idea to go back to the old high school reunion.After all, the friends and families of people who undergo theseoperations require a lot of time and sometimes a lot of therapy todeal with the transformation.
But to take a room full of people who two decades ago knew youas Ron, and to now ask them to suddenly reverse gears and deal withyou Rhonda, is asking a lot.
It's hard enough for most people to deal with the best lookingguy going bald after 20 years, or the drippiest girl getting divineafter 20 years, without having to deal with pantyhose on a person whoused to wear cleats.
"We had all heard about it before, but hearing was one thing.Seeing, quite another. I mean, there I was talking to this guy andwe're trying to figure out who this girl is in this red dress. So Iwalk over and it turns out to be Ron. I mean Rhonda. We almostdied," says Lynn.
"We all wanted to be nice, but the whole thing was real hard todeal with. This guy had always wanted to be sort of the class clown,but he wasn't all that funny. He was more the class buffoon. So ina sense we weren't all that surprised he showed up, it's just that heshowed up in this red dress, these seamed stockings and with a flowerin his hair. Her hair. It was just too weird."
Without question, the weirdness was the most intense in theladies' room. Because here were all these 37-year-old womenterrified that this person who used to exit the boys' rooms now hadlegal access to the girls'.
"We were not real mature about it," Lynn says. "We all keptchecking under the stalls for his shoes. Her shoes. But, thankheaven, she wasn't ever there."
Of course, in a sense Ron/Rhonda was everywhere. "The impact ofthis couldn't help but affect the whole reunion," recalls Lynn. "Ourclass had around 100 people, but I don't think it would have matteredif our class had been 40 or 400. You want to be modern, but hisstory was a bit much. I mean 20 years ago, this guy had marriedsomeone in our class and had had a child with her. Now he was backas a woman who had married some guy, only the guy died. So in effectthis was a person who has been a groom, a dad, a divorced guy, abride, a mom and was now back in our midst as a widow. It was just alot to handle."
Hardest to handle, however, will be the next reunion. Becausewhen the 30th comes around, Lynn and the rest of her femaleclassmates will be around 48.
"God, I dread it," says Lynn. "We'll all be nice and menopausaland going through all this hormone replacement. Only good old Rhondawill have had a 15-year head start on it, and she'll look better thanall of us."
Reunion of guys, gals - and gal who was a guy
When Michael went to the 20th reunion of his nice, middle-classhigh school, he discovered two of his classmates had become actualmurderers.
I always thought that was about the topper when it came to theWeird Roads Taken category of high school reunion stories. I waswrong.
Lynn's story is the topper. Because Lynn just got back from herhigh school reunion out East and, uh, this person who had left herclass as a guy? Well, he returned to her class reunion as kind of agirl.
Now we all know people have sex change operations. But thething is, we almost never hear of a person who had one who thinksit's a real neat idea to go back to the old high school reunion.After all, the friends and families of people who undergo theseoperations require a lot of time and sometimes a lot of therapy todeal with the transformation.
But to take a room full of people who two decades ago knew youas Ron, and to now ask them to suddenly reverse gears and deal withyou Rhonda, is asking a lot.
It's hard enough for most people to deal with the best lookingguy going bald after 20 years, or the drippiest girl getting divineafter 20 years, without having to deal with pantyhose on a person whoused to wear cleats.
"We had all heard about it before, but hearing was one thing.Seeing, quite another. I mean, there I was talking to this guy andwe're trying to figure out who this girl is in this red dress. So Iwalk over and it turns out to be Ron. I mean Rhonda. We almostdied," says Lynn.
"We all wanted to be nice, but the whole thing was real hard todeal with. This guy had always wanted to be sort of the class clown,but he wasn't all that funny. He was more the class buffoon. So ina sense we weren't all that surprised he showed up, it's just that heshowed up in this red dress, these seamed stockings and with a flowerin his hair. Her hair. It was just too weird."
Without question, the weirdness was the most intense in theladies' room. Because here were all these 37-year-old womenterrified that this person who used to exit the boys' rooms now hadlegal access to the girls'.
"We were not real mature about it," Lynn says. "We all keptchecking under the stalls for his shoes. Her shoes. But, thankheaven, she wasn't ever there."
Of course, in a sense Ron/Rhonda was everywhere. "The impact ofthis couldn't help but affect the whole reunion," recalls Lynn. "Ourclass had around 100 people, but I don't think it would have matteredif our class had been 40 or 400. You want to be modern, but hisstory was a bit much. I mean 20 years ago, this guy had marriedsomeone in our class and had had a child with her. Now he was backas a woman who had married some guy, only the guy died. So in effectthis was a person who has been a groom, a dad, a divorced guy, abride, a mom and was now back in our midst as a widow. It was just alot to handle."
Hardest to handle, however, will be the next reunion. Becausewhen the 30th comes around, Lynn and the rest of her femaleclassmates will be around 48.
"God, I dread it," says Lynn. "We'll all be nice and menopausaland going through all this hormone replacement. Only good old Rhondawill have had a 15-year head start on it, and she'll look better thanall of us."
